Funny Answer Machine Messages for your phone
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If you are the type of a person who loves having witty answer phone messages, then this article is for you. There is a selection of messages below. Take your pick.
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Message 1
"Hi. This is (your name).
If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.
If you are my parents, please send money.
If you are my Bank, you didn't lend me enough money.
If you are my friends, you owe me money.
If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money."
Message 2
"Hello, this is (your name) We're in the middle of a family fight right now. Leave your name and number at the beep and whoever wins will call you right back."
Message 3
"Hello, you have reached the automated answering service for (your name), your message will be answered to in the order in which it was received, your message is number 8,343, please hold, your message is important to me."
Message 4
"Me no here. Me go bye. Leave me message. Me reply."
Message 5
(for guys) "The President is not in his office at this time. Please leave your name, phone number, the name of the country you wish to invade, and the secret password."
Message 6
"Sorry, (your name) is not here right now. Please leave your name and number after the tone. If you are calling regarding an outstanding debt, please leave your message BEFORE the tone."
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The Ultimate Message
My favourite funny Answer Machine message is by Liam Neeson. if you have watched the movie “Taken” you will understand.
I was watching the Graham Norton show a while ago and he was a guest. A fan requested he leave an answer phone message on her mobile phone. It was brilliant to listen to. You can listen to it below. He records it 2 minutes into the video – you have to listen to it. See video above - Awesome!!
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CommentsLoading...
These are cool, I would like to try one!
This was fun! Best one I ever heard was "(your name) summer home, sum 'er home, sum 'er not. Voted up and funny.
Awesome...
Funny, funny, funny!!!
@resspenser - Good to see you again. Thanks for stopping by.
@Brianna - Thanks Brianna. I hope people still leave a meassage... :)
@TimeTraveler2 - I like that one too. "Some are home, some are not." lol
@iguidenetwork - Cheers. Thanks for your comment.
@gmaoli - Hi Gmaoli. I can see you laughing. Thanks for stopping by.
Absolutely awesome hub Lady_E, my favourite is number 1.
I watched the Graham Norton clip and can remember watching when it was first aired, superb.
Voted up and Awesome.
Awesome! I loved this so much...Made my day. Keep them coming LadyE. Brilliant.
@Paulgc
Cheers Paul. I still have the program recorded on my TV. It was so funny to watch. Thanks for stopping. Good to see you.
@donnaisabella
Lovely to see you again. I'm glad it made your day.
Good Luck with the Amazon competition.
Funny, I like the number 2 message. I need to get something funny..Thank you for great ideas..
Great subject Lady_E I am always stuck for something original on the answer machine and usually end up with 'at the beep you know what to do'. Thank you...:)
@alwaysexploring
I was just thinking you recently read my Hub about Lionel Richie - Maybe we could get him to record:
"Hello, is it me you're looking for?" on your answer phone. :)
@one2ge2no
I quite like that one. I've heard it a few times... "at the beep, you know what to do"
Thanks for stopping. :)
Hi Elena.
Super hub, had me smiling at all the messages and the Liam Neeson's is good. A naughty one that I laugh at is "Wong Fu King Chinese Westauwant"
Take care Elena and have a nice evening.
LOL Ghaelach
@Ghaelach
Hello Ghaelach - Thanks, I'm glad it got you smiling and I will get a friend to record "Wong Fu King Chinese Westauwant". I can't record it with a straight face. I will save it - just use it at weekends.
Have a lovely evening too.
Cheers. :)
resspenser Level 4 Commenter 3 months ago
Great lines, have to try a couple of these!